Beware of the Blob! (Angel in the Kitchen)

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Long after midnight, while watching a creepy classic on the late late movie, we see it: a scene so hideous in its simple truth, so horrifying that— We shudder and try to look away, but it’s too late; and now, we may never be able to fully purge the sickening image from our fevered brains!

The scene: in a dimly-lit kitchen a woman is removing what appears to be an ordinary cookie sheet from her oven. Unbeknownst to her, however, a strange alien substance has covered the cookie sheet … an evil, slimy film that’s been lurking there … awaiting the right moment to strike.

The nasty stuff begins to grow … rising, taking on a ghoulish shape. It’s grey and gooey, sticky and scarier than anything we’ve seen before!

Wait a minute, we cry in unison. Are we watching a repeat of The Blob with Steve McQueen? Remember that 1958 sci-fi flick? Hapless viewers were warned by the movie’s opening theme song, “Beware of the blob! It creeps; And leaps, and glides and slides; Across the floor; Right through the door; And all around the wall — A splotch, a blotch! Be careful of the blob!” Corny? Hey, watch it! The great pop composer Burt Bacharach wrote those crazy lyrics!

All this aside, we were absolutely wrong. Guess our minds wandered a moment, and we hadn’t realized we were now watching a commercial for Pam Cooking Spray. You know, the stuff that keeps food from sticking to pots, pans and baking surfaces.

Apparently, the lady in the commercial had forgotten to spray on the Pam, and now the thin residue of old food, which clung tenaciously to her cookie sheet, was rising up to expose her mistake. “I am the ghost of meals past,” it proclaims, ready to haunt your tastebuds with the disgusting flavors of meals long gone but not quite forgotten.

Imagine, a funky residue of spinach quiche invading the taste of your chocolate chip cookies! Nothing ruins the enjoyment of a good cookie more than something nasty-tasting mingling with the butter and brown sugar! Yuck!

And, heh, life is like a cookie sheet. No, really! In life, we make mistakes; we encounter conflicts and disappointments; and in our relationships we experience, at one time or another, hurts, misunderstandings, and even betrayals. Sometimes the pain and disillusionment of the past lingers on. It sticks to us like that gooey glob in the Pam commercial! We think we’ve moved on, but a thin film of nasty experiences sticks to our hearts. It’s those memories that leave a “bad taste” in our mouths — months, even years, later. These “ghosts” can continue to haunt us, with emotional “residue” that can contaminate fresh relationships and new experiences, preventing us from fully tasting all the good things in life!

Why do bad things seem to stick, even long after we “forgive and forget”? Well, with God, forgiveness and acceptance are instant. The Bible states, “God is faithful and reliable. If we confess our sins, He forgives them and cleanses us from everything we’ve done wrong.” (1 John 1:9 GOD’S WORD)

There’s no residue of the past, because nothing sticks! The cookie sheet of our lives is left clean as a whistle! And our loving, merciful Heavenly Father does not bring up the past to mess up the “flavor” of our present. Instead, He casts “all our sins into the depths of the sea.” (Micah 7:19 Jubilee Bible). In other words, He scours the “pan” and then flushes the residue down the drain!

Alas, if only people could do the same! Being weak and fallen creatures (say “humans”), we tend to cling to our hurts and disappointments. This partly stems from self-righteousness. Ouch! We all make mistakes, and we’ve all let someone down in the past. But we refuse to consider the old proverb, “To err is human, to forgive divine!” So we need to give those who hurt us a break. After all, they’re only human! Spray on the PAM of love and forgiveness! “For Love covers a multitude of sins.” (1 Peter 4:8 NLT)

We need to cut ourselves some slack, too. Some emotional wounds do take time to heal. And yet, even after forgiving ourselves and others — and moving forward — we may still feel some emotional residue. But that’s where God comes into the picture! He is like spiritual PAM!

As we grow closer to God, we become more like Him. We begin to see things the way He sees them, and we begin to respond the way God would respond. As we mature in the Lord, we are better able to overcome hurts and disappointments. We get better at forgiving, and better at going through life without having every insult and injury stick to us!

We can only truly forgive and move forward when we include God in the process. So, be honest with your Heavenly Father. Present your hurts to Him in prayer. “Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.” (1 Peter 5:7 NLT) Ask Him to scrape away any emotional residue, to give you a divine perspective, and cover you with His love!

A little spiritual PAM will keep you free from those ugly emotional blobs that come creeping and crawling — and which try to cling to the heart. Don’t get stuck! Be free! Free from being haunted by the ghosts of past mistakes, hurts, and disappointments. Free to taste the good things God has prepared for you. (Ephesians 2:10)

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The Truth About Triangles (Angel in the Kitchen)

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Triangles can often spell trouble! Legend has it there’s an area in the western part of the North Atlantic Ocean where numerous ships and planes have mysteriously disappeared. This loosely defined area has been called the Bermuda Triangle, or — The Devil’s Triangle! Now, we’re not exactly sold on the idea that of all the various shapes, the triangle is the most insidious; but its particular geometry has a history of vexing people.

Egypt’s great pyramids may have been a place of rest for the Pharaohs of Old, but not for the slaves who labored to construct these imposing stone monuments. And what did the average “underpaid” laborer working on King Tut’s tomb behold? The four triangular faces of the pyramid!

Sinister, right? And in school, when he wasn’t throwing spitballs, the worst kid in band class got to play the … triangle! Perhaps there’s good reason the triangle belongs to a type of musical instruments labeled idiophone! (Funny? Hey, this is the kind of stuff that’s just too crazy to be made up!)

And in life, love, and relationships, triangles always cause emotional pain, and usually end in disaster.

The shape of a triangle has 3 sides and three points. A triangle relationship involves 3 people and has 3 sides (to the story). In a marriage, an emotional triangle can lead to spiritual and/or physical adultery — requiring a fourth person to get involved, one with a law degree! Please don’t go there. Adulterous triangles are hard to square with God and spouses. (Pun intended.)

If you’re dating, then you know triangles can be just as aggravating outside a marriage. It’s hard to have a meaningful relationship with a friend (or parent, or brother, or sister, or even a family pet) whose attentions and loyalties are divided. People are, after all, naturally selfish, self-centered and possessive. So, having a third party present, especially one who’s competing for attention (and even affection) can be aggravating.

Johnny Mathis recorded a popular song about the woes of a triangle in dating. “I seem to be the victim of a cruel jest,” he crooned. “It dogs my footsteps with the girl I love the best. She’s just the sweetest thing that I have ever known; But still we never get the chance to be alone. My car will meet her — And her mother comes too! It’s a two-seater — Still her mother comes too!”

We don’t believe Mathis was singling out moms, because he includes a verse about sulking at his club — only to have his girl friend’s brother tag along! “There may be times when couples need a chaperone; But mothers ought to learn to leave a chap alone. I wish they’d have a heart and use their common sense; For three’s a crowd, and more — it’s triple the expense!”

There are situations, however, in which three is NOT a crowd, and the poor, teary-eyed triangle gets an opportunity to redeem his much-maligned geometry. The first is in the kitchen. (See? We may fly off on a tangent, but we always find our way back to the heart of the home!)

Designers and architects frequently express the need to arrange the cook top, the sink, and the refrigerator into a shape that ensures each is only a few steps from the others. The primary tasks involved in preparing a meal are carried out between these three “kitchen angels,” and reducing the distance between them reduces the time and energy spent cooking. The three workhorses of the kitchen should form a triangle; and according to designers, the imaginary lines between the sink, range, and refrigerator should be no more than 9 feet.

This idea seems new, but it actually goes back to the 1940s. Efficiency experts dubbed it the “kitchen work triangle,” correctly stating that food storage (from the refrigerator), preparation (at the sink) and cooking (on
the range) are easier and less tiring when these three elements are closely gathered in a triangular formation.

We’ve visited some homes with cavernous kitchens, in which the cook needed roller skates to get from the range to the sink to the fridge! The acoustics in these oversized kitchens are great — the beeping of the microwave produces a pleasing echo as the sound bounces from wall to far wall — but cooking a meal in such a space can be exhausting! The kitchen work triangle creates an efficient and well-ordered arrangement that facilitates life in the heart of the home.

There’s another triangle that’s indispensable. One which creates an efficient and well-ordered arrangement, and facilitates the heart of life. It’s called the spiritual triangle! In the endeavors of life, the triangle is formed between you, your pursuits (dreams, decisions, activities, job, hobbies, etc.) and GOD. In relationships, the triangle is formed between you, your spouse (or friend or family member, etc.) and GOD.

When you commit to being one of the parts of the spiritual triangle, your life will be well-ordered and your activities will seem less tiring. Your life will become more efficient, so to speak; spiritually efficient, because including God in your plans will facilitate all you do. But it’s not enough to simply include God in your geometric pattern for living; like the kitchen work triangle, the spiritual triangle operates at peak efficiency when the three parts are close together.

Being closer to God, more deeply connected, helps maintain the primary tasks of the heart (life, love, and relationships). His infinite love, His wisdom, and His guidance all work together to ease the everyday struggles of life. Furthermore, in relationships, His presence strengthens the bonds between people, and keeps clean-ups to a minimum. When we have a good relationship with God, we’re better equipped to handle relationships with others. God and other people, the two are closely tied together: “Jesus said, Love the Lord your God with all your passion and prayer and intelligence. This is the most important, the first on any list. But there is a second to set alongside it: Love others as well as you love yourself. These two commands are pegs; everything in God’s Law … hangs from them.” (Matthew 22:37-40 MSG)

The third peg in the spiritual triangle can be YOU if you’re willing to surrender to God (by letting Him call all the shots), and draw closer to Him through worship, prayer, and Bible study. So, next time you’re in the kitchen, look for the work triangle. Let it remind you of God’s love for you, and His divine wisdom and power, which can abundantly facilitate all you do. God’s spiritual triangle will always make life easier, and you can always trust Him to keep you anchored in your corner.

“Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. …[But] three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.” (Ecclesiastes 4:9, 12 NLT)

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