“A merry heart doeth good like a medicine!” (Proverbs 17:22 KJV)
A cat burglar broke into my house last night and started searching for money! So I jumped out of bed and searched with him!
A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than men who mention it.
My goal for 2019 was to lose just 10 pounds! Only 15 to go.
Don’t mean to brag, but … I finished my 14-day diet in 3 hours and 20 minutes flat.
Need exercise? I just did a week’s worth of cardio after walking into a spider web.
Last night I ate salad for dinner! Mostly croutons and tomatoes. Actually, it was just one big, round crouton covered with tomato sauce. And cheese. OKAY! So it was a pizza! I ate a pizza! Cheeze!
Kids today don’t know how easy they have it. When I was young, I had to walk 9 feet through shag carpet to change the TV channel.
And remember back when we were kids and every time it was below zero outside they closed school? Me neither.
I may not be that funny or athletic or good looking or smart or talented, but … I forgot where I was going with this.
Recipe of the week: How to prepare Tofu
1. Carefully unwrap tofu
2. Throw it in the trash
3. Grill some meat
Special thanks to Wanda Espaillat for forwarding these funny bits to us!